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We are still alive!!! Despite a prolonged absence, we are alive and well. It takes a lot of work to keep our fans entertained, and to be honest, we are the laziest fuckers you will ever meet. That, and the fact that we have 3 members who are retarded and only 2 who are functionally literate, and you can see how this is such a chore. We are basically no smarter than a hoard of howler monkeys

Saturday, October 2, 2010

A BC4M road trip and beyond

As many of you may know, there is a small contingent in the BC4M that are what most would affectionately call "road whores". They possess a wandering spirit that has a thirst for adventure and a love for finding new experiences somewhere down the highway. These "rogues" love to spin yarns about the scantily clad "beer wenches"that they have run into at various watering holes across this great fruited plain that allow you to sip the rarest of beers from between their bountiful juggies. Bim had heard of such place in what the locals here know as P-Town but appears on the map as Portsmouth. It is a German restaurant and tavern called The Bier Garden. The list of beers they have is enormous and supposedly the Frauleins were like cougars so we decided we would make a rare BC4M pilgrimage to see what all the fuss was about. Snake, Fred, John Wilder and Bim were accompanied by a couple of chaperone's (Mrs. Bim and Mrs Fred) to make sure we abided by the look but don't touch rule in case we happened to be served by a couple of horny voluptuous vixens with a penchant for handsome craft beer drinkers. We ordered lunch and had a few tasty new beers while we sat back and enjoyed an unseasonably warm Saturday afternoon outside on the party pavilion. First up was an Ayinger Octoberfest (5.8%) which was malty and nutty with a hint of toasted bread flavor. A solid good, we also tried a Paulaner Octoberfest (5.8%) which was just as tasty. We also had a few beers previously rated like the RFG Trappists Rochefort 8 and the really good Dogfish Head Punk. Sadly, the waitress wasn't wearing lederhosen and she definitely wasn't letting us sip from her ample bosom, so after we finished up our lunch of various meats and sausages and cheeses, we loaded up the paddy wagon and headed over to Norfolk to try a few beers at The Taphouse. The decor screams musty dive bar, the floors are as sticky as the wet spot you made your girlfriend sleep on last night and the few patrons there all looked like they had just awoken from a 18 hour bongathon. Despite the fact we probably needed a tetanus booster from just being there, we ordered up a few new beers including Victory Hop Devil IPA (6.7%) which had just enough hop bite without pulling the enamel off your teeth so it got a good. We also had a Bear Republic Hop Rod Rye Ale (8.0%) that tasted like it should be used as the basis for a reuben sandwich. Dry and bitter, it was only a so-so. We then tried a Abita Restoration Pale Ale (5.0%) which lacked any distinguishing character and was just a plain nondescript beer that is similar to what a generic cereal is, cause if the knock-off brand tasted as good as Cap'n Crunch we wouldn't be calling it Colossal Crunch. The last beer we tried before we left was Duchesse de Bourgogne (6.2%) a Flanders style red ale that was sour and a little vinegary but still smooth as silk. It rated a good although the girls thought it tasted like a glass of red wine vinegar. Knowing we had to make it back home before the zombies came out after dark, we cruised back to the hood for a backyard fiesta at Casa de Snake. Since we had only eaten about 10 pounds of meat for lunch, Snake curbed our hunger pains by grilling up about 4 dozen brats and sausages for dinner. We sat under the stars on his recently remodeled deck thats is bigger than most double wides. While we grubbed out we tried some more new beers. First was Spaten Oktoberfest (5.9%), which was watery and a little skunky. "Damn Krauts", said Fred "always sending us this skunk piss, when will they get over the fact we kicked their schnitzel loving asses in two wars?" Compared to the Oktoberfest's we had earlier, this one was a dud and got a so-so. Next was a J.W. Dundee Octoberfest (5.5%) which was just as watery as the first one but smelled a lot nicer. The taste again was marginal, so it too got a so-so. Next was a Jolly Pumpkin Madrugada Obscura Dark Dawn Stout (8.1%). Featuring a label that had a rubenesque succubus with a bodacious backside and tiny funbags, the beer was both a sour and stout at the same time. "This is the most unusual beer I have ever tasted" said Bim, as Fred added, "How the fuck can you make a stout taste sour but yet be so flippin good?". An amazingly different beer, this one was really good and we would definitely drink it again. The final beer of the day was Troeg's Hopback Amber Ale (6.0%). This is the definition of a good session beer. Full of flavor and easy drinking, this one is the kind of beer you buy by the case. A solid good, we downed our glasses and then made our way home after a long beer filled day. The rogue faction of the BC4M might just be on to something with these day trips, seems like we are gonna have to make this kinda thing happen more often. Until next time.......Prosit!


Anonymous said...

More road trips!!!!