defrLatest Breaking News..

We are still alive!!! Despite a prolonged absence, we are alive and well. It takes a lot of work to keep our fans entertained, and to be honest, we are the laziest fuckers you will ever meet. That, and the fact that we have 3 members who are retarded and only 2 who are functionally literate, and you can see how this is such a chore. We are basically no smarter than a hoard of howler monkeys

Saturday, April 24, 2010

I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell night

After surviving the 20 beer blitzkrieg of our record setting meeting, the boys decided that an evening of cinema was in order. The resident literary expert, BimBim, had recently discussed the merits of a little book of supposedly true to life stories he had stumbled across. Bim said this book would be banned in most countries, and any woman that actually said she liked the book was obviously swinging for the other team. "I Hope they serve beer in hell" was the name, and someone in Hollywood thought it would be a good idea to turn it into a movie. Fred found the dvd at the local Target (or Tar-zhay as the locals know it). What better thing to do while watching a new movie than try a few beers? With no real theme for the beers, we simply cracked open what was in the beer fridge, a mix of previously drank but not rated beers and some we had never sampled. The first couple of beers were from Dogfish Head ( as you all know, we love the DFH), 90 Minute IPA (9.0%) which was incredibly smooth, for a heavy hopped beer, this is velvety smooth, and rated a good, on the cusp of RFG. We then tried the 60 Minute IPA (6.0%) which was good but not as smooth as the 90 min. The boys at DFH can make a killer IPA, and they actually have a combo IPA, the 75 Minute Johnny Cask that takes the IPA to whole new level. The only member to actually taste Johnny Cask is J. Wilder (see the attached picture from the DFH brewpub, thanks for bringing some back douche) and he said it blows both the 60 and 90 Minute versions away. Can anyone say Road trip? Next up was Founders Brewing's Double Trouble IPA (9.4%). These guys make some great beers, and we are still patiently awaiting the arrival of their KBS (Kentucky Breakfast Stout, the beer that has achieved legendary cult-like status as the best beer in America). This one was described as,"smooth hoppy goodness" although according to Jon Wilder, "it didn't make me all hard like the 90 Min did". A great beer indeed and to think, we hadn't even started the movie yet. If you have kept up with our postings, you know one our new favorite brewers is Oskar Blues, which has had 3 of their beers receive the coveted RFG. We tried their newest canned slice of heaven, Gubna Imperial IPA (10.0%). Boasting over 100 IBU's (thats International Bitterness Units, a method of describing how bitter a beer is based on the amount of hops used. The top of the measurement range is about 100, and this self-desribed "hop grenade" says it is over 100). We surely believe it. But let me tell you dear readers, this beer SUCKS. Even your favorite beer maker can fuck shit up, and Oskar is surely singing the Blues with this can of "onion flavored dishwater", or as resident curmudgeon Fred said, "this is like drinking a can of Roundup, only Roundup tastes a lot better". Fred was certainly happy he had wasted 15 bucks on these 4 cans of herbicide, but hey, they have a great batting average when it comes to making good beers. We cleansed our palate and then popped the cap off of Primator Doppel Bock (10.5%). We love the bocks and doppelbocks, but this so-so rated beer tasted like "fortified maple syrup" and one member said, "oh yea, if I run out of Cocoa Pebbles in the morning I just pour a bowl of this stuff, its the same fucking thing". Another insane beer from Dogfish Head, Fort (18.0%) was poured for all the members. 10pm showed up just in time to try this beer brewed with over 1 ton (2000 lbs. for you folks that slept through weights and measures class in 3rd grade) of pureed raspberries. All but 10pm gave this a good, he said it was so-so. This unique beverage tasted liked a much improved version of Boone's Farm Wine, but still retaining the carbonation of a beer. Somehow the movie still hadn't started and J. Wilder had to bid adieu to take his bride out for a date, and 10pm was playing the role of chaperone for a few of the BC4M wives and their night on the town, so it was down to a 3 pack of beer hounds. We went ahead and started the flick and tried a few more beers. Lefthand Brewing's Chainsaw Double Saw Tooth (9.0%) was offered next and all of us said "thats a damn good beer, we could drink alot of this smooth elixir". Bonus points for the label on this beer being wicked cool (insert joke here about how lame it is for a Southerner to use a Yankee term like wicked cool). Thomas Creek Brewery's Kind Beer Pale Ale (7.3%) was next, and it was better than the Chainsaw and rated a Good to almost an RFG (we will drink this one again with full membership present to see if it actually will join the hall of RFGs.) While we tasted this one, the movie got going, and let me tell you, there are some side-splitting, beer shooting out of your nose moments to be had. I can't go into too many details, but if crude language and sexual humor isn't your thing, don't waste your money. If your capable of laughing at a scene of a guy running through a hotel lobby while vainly attempting to keep from pooping his pants, well then welcome home. Guys, unless your girl is completely drunk, or rides a bigger motorcycle than you, or can out bench press you, or is a butch named Pete, keep this movie away while she is around. She would probably be happier if she walked in on you up late one night watching Skinemax than laughing at the antics of Tucker Max. Even though Bim said the book was 1000 times funnier and grosser, this movie was full of laughs. Guys (and no I don't mean you girly men that drink Bud Lite w/Lime), get some cold beers and prepare to laugh your fucking nuts off. The final beer of the night (honestly by coincidence) was Flying Dog's Raging Bitch Belgian Style IPA (8.3%), which was how many of the girls in the movie would have been described by any dude that still has a full sack. Good but not RFG, we had ended the night with 3 straight beers that are very good indeed. The movie ended and soon after so did our night, but our quest for new beers is neverending. Until next time..."Drink up bitches!"