defrLatest Breaking News..

We are still alive!!! Despite a prolonged absence, we are alive and well. It takes a lot of work to keep our fans entertained, and to be honest, we are the laziest fuckers you will ever meet. That, and the fact that we have 3 members who are retarded and only 2 who are functionally literate, and you can see how this is such a chore. We are basically no smarter than a hoard of howler monkeys

Thursday, June 28, 2012

Who We Are

     In recognition of 100,000 visits to our website, I'd like to take a minute to remind our readers who we are. The Beer Club for Men formed nearly 3 yrs ago. We decided, on Johnny's back porch, to make a valiant attempt to rate every craft beer ever brewed. Little did we know that we were on the verge of a nationwide brewing tsunami, that would make such an attempt nearly impossible. Over the years we've made lots of friends, and even a few enemies. One local drinking establishment has banished us like a big turd from a giant colon. We're offensive and obnoxious, we get that. We don't really care, but we get it.
    We are predominantly white middle aged men, although one guy looks like he could be Mexican, another is surely an illegal (Guatemalan, Pakistani, Himalayan??? we can't tell), and there is one senior citizen, who, like Obama, refuses to provide us his "real" birth certificate. We love babies, but only when they are sucking on some MILF's cans at the mall. We prefer V-8's over electric cars for obvious reasons. We grew up when kids played tackle football and rode bikes without wearing helmets. If you got your noggin smashed, you rode the short bus... end of story. We think Ronald Reagan was the best president, ever. No really, the best fucking president EVER.  We watch football on Saturdays, Sundays, Mondays, and sometimes Thursdays. We don't wear skinny jeans, and don't tolerate "men" who do. We have salty language, and we don't give a shit if it offends you. There's a disclaimer at the beginning of this blog, if you're too lazy to read it, that's your fucking problem. We actually have real jobs, and support about 1000 shitbags who don't, thanks to our exorbitantly high taxes. We prefer dogs over cats (a little too much so in Bim's case). We love our fellow craft beer bloggers and drinkers, as well as those drinking establishments who really understand the American craft beer scene. We hate to use the word scene, but reserve the right to do so when we feel hip (we hate that word too). We think John Wayne may have been the last true American movie star with balls (Clint Eastwood is a close second, Johnny Depp isn't even on the list). We hate Hitler, but miss Gaddafi with his silly perm and fake military uniforms. We ate lead paint chips and huffed leaded gasoline as children, and out of the 9 members only one is mildly retarded. Just goes to show that the risk was overrated. We will eat a bald eagle, a whale, or loggerhead turtle eggs if given the chance. Who knows, manatees may taste like bacon. We have an elaborate rating system for our farts, and have been known to send each other photos of impressively large stools. We like to dry hump pit bulls to show them who the boss is (Bim insisted we add this). We know that the latest trend among men is that of metrosexuality and political correctness but we just won't go there. We think Michael Bloomberg is an asshole for banning 32 oz sodas, but allowing hobos to buy 40oz Olde English 800. If a movie has foul humor, profanity, zombies, nudity, or lots of gratuitous killing, we'll watch it. If it stars Johnny Depp or Richard Gere, we won't. We freely admit that we watch Nascar hoping to see a wreck. We are always looking to start new chapters with younger beer lovers everywhere. We think "50 Shades of Gray" is a description of dog vision. We hate Nickelback, just like the rest of America. And lastly, we are passionate about American craft beers. Our rating scale may be rudimentary and unsophisticated, but there's no doubt where we stand when we rate a beer. We're not always going to match your opinion of what a beer tastes like, but according to JD Power and Associates, 60% of the time we're right all the time. Now that we've introduced ourselves again, let's rate some beers!
     We started the night with an Virginia brewery, Starr Hill and their All Access Wee Heavy (8.5%). These guys have stepped up there game on this one. It was a real nice example of a Scottish Ale that we all liked a lot, rating a really good. Next was one from the Rare Beer Club, Sly Fox's Ichor (10%). Like most Belgian beers, the over-carbonation was obnoxious but the taste was good, rating such. Finch Beer Co.'s Cutthroat Pale Ale (5.5%) was supposedly brewed with orange peel but we couldn't taste it. A little orange may have helped mask the other offensive flavors. At least no one hurled. It rated a so/so. Deschutes and Boulevard's Conflux Series No. 2 White IPA (7.3%) was like a Manny Pacquiao fight decision, all over the place. Some liked it, others loathed it. Total vote...good. Founders/Green Flash Linch Pin White IPA (7.0%) was a better example of this style of beer, and was a solid good. DuClaw's Soul Jacker is a blend of Black Jack and Devils Milk (9.5%). We like these two separately, and hoped the blend would be awesome, but it was only a good. Terrapin Side Project 16 Phlux Capacitor (9.8%) is billed as an oak aged American Ale. No one liked it, giving it a so/so. Please put that shit back in the barrel! Independence Brewing Co.'s Jasperilla Old Ale(9.3%) was another miss, rating only a so/so. Stone's Bottleworks 13th Anniversary Ale (11%) is a one-off that Stone brews for the famed Seattle bottle store. Someday we hope to see our own BC4M brewery brew some swill for our favorite bottle shop, Grape and Gourmet. Maybe a 200 IBU hop bomb with Jimson weed and bath salts, called Face Eater Angry Hop Zombie. This beer however, unlike anything from us, was good. Dry Dock's Signature Series Bligh's Barleywine (10%) was the surprise of the night. Sweet, with a very complex flavor, we loved this beer, rating it a really good. Despite the Urban Dictionary description of Dry Dock, this beer rocks! Full Pint Brewing Co. supplied us with their Tri-PA, Tripel Batch Imperial IPA (9%) whatever that means. It was drinkable but not overly enjoyable, rating only a good. Next was Crooked Stave's Blackberry Petite Sour (5.0%). Everybody loves blackberry's and we also love sours. This beer hit the nail on the head. It was an easy really good. We followed that with Cantillon's Classic Gueze (9%). Like many beers in this style, it smelled like shit, but once you get past that, this sour beer was a crowd pleaser, rating a really good. We were on a sour run now, so we uncapped a Natty Greene's 230th Anniversary Oak Aged American Sour Ale (6.2%) which was surprisingly good. We have been rather hard on these guys in the past, but this beer was nice, rating a really good. The Bruery's Sans Pagaie (5.8%) is a sour blonde aged in oak with cherries. Another great sour beer, another really good. Goose Island Madame Rose (2010) (6.5%) is a Belgian style ale aged in wine barrels, with cherries, and was another really good. Snake remarked that he hadn't been exposed to this much fruit since the last time he spent a whole week starring at the Folsom Street Fair. And the sours just kept coming. Russian River's Beatification (Batch #5)(6.0%) was the final sour of the night, and maybe the best. Another really good beer, these guys rock!  On to the stouts. We started with  Goose Island's Big John (11.5%). Goose Island makes some outstanding stouts, and this was no exception. All that was missing was 6 months in a bourbon barrel to push this one to RFG status. Still, it easily rated a really good. We ended the night with a Fifty Fifty Eclispe (2011 Buffalo Trace)(9.5%). Another great beer. Dark as night with just the right amount of whiskey flavor, this beer was an easy really good. So smooth! A cool 19 beers down, it was time to call it a night. Cheers from the BC4M! And thanks for your constant support and verbal abuse! We look forward to the next 100,000 visitors!

7 comments:

ILuvTheBirch said...

Let me take a minute to remind you who I am! I would never be caught dead without my skinny jeans! If you can put your pants on in less than 10 minutes its not worth wearing.If you have heard of a band then I dont like it. Any beer whos name you can pronounce sucks.Obama is the greatest president hands down.I wear black rim glasses but my vision is perfect.Everything I do is ironic for the sake of being ironic. I have money but do everything I can to appear poor.I drop a grand in the trift store monthly.My shoes and wallet are made of hemp.I carry a currior bag for my Mac book, iphone, ipad and ipod.I wear a beanie in the summer. I spend an hour in the mirror on my hair to acheive the perfect bed look.I need my yoga and always always eat organic. Instagram is the greatest app ever made and wouldnt dream of taking a photo without it. I hope to one day have a handle bar mustache. Coffee makers are lame, I use a french press. I am uncomfortable if I ever leave Ghent. All my T-shirts are v-neck.I paid $100 for the members only jacket you threw away in 1984. I own over 40 scarfs.And if anything in this postis misspelled, I did it to be ironic!

TheItalianSaison said...

@ILoveTheBirch......i think i love you!

Anonymous said...

Maybe you two homo gloryhole experts can get married and live a life of rainbow sherbet douchiness together

ILuvTheBirch said...

I wouldn't say 8-10 trips to a glory hole would make me an expert! I love rainbow sherbet!

Anonymous said...

jiwlqfjwa
アグ
アグ
ugg ブーツ
ugg ブーツ
ugg ムートンブーツ

[url=http://www.winterbootsfor2012.com/]ugg ムートンブーツ[/url]
[url=http://www.ilovetheboots.com/] ugg ムートンブーツ[/url]
[url=http://www.japanwinterboots.com/]ugg ミニ[/url]
[url=http://www.snowbootsforwinter.com/] ugg キッズ[/url]
[url=http://www.winterbootsforjp.com/]アグブーツ[/url]

http://www.allthesnowboots.com/ アグ
http://www.ilovetheboots.com/ アグ
http://www.chanluuoutletjapan.com/ chan luu ブレスレット
http://www.chanluuofficials.com/ chan luu アクセサリー
http://www.winterbootsforjapan.com/ アグ

Anonymous said...

Hello. And Bye. Thank you very much.

Anonymous said...

Hello. And Bye. Thank you very much.