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We are still alive!!! Despite a prolonged absence, we are alive and well. It takes a lot of work to keep our fans entertained, and to be honest, we are the laziest fuckers you will ever meet. That, and the fact that we have 3 members who are retarded and only 2 who are functionally literate, and you can see how this is such a chore. We are basically no smarter than a hoard of howler monkeys

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Road Trip to Appalachia

BC4M , tired of only having 400 different beers awaiting tasting, decided a road trip for more beer was in order. This time, it was Jackie O's 6th anniversary...9+ hrs of driving time, each way, for a bottle release... no problem! Jackie O's is a small brewpub in a fairly rural area of south eastern Ohio, best known for Ohio University, coal miners, and professional partiers! Head Brewer Brad Clark is one of the most innovative brewers on the East Coast, producing multiple different sours and a whole variety of barrel-aged beers. Fred, Nestle, Bim and Florence loaded up the beermobile and headed west. First stop was Blue Mountain Brewery in Afton, VA. We were fairly harsh on this brewery in the past, and while we don't ever apologize for skewering a brewer for manufacturing swill, these guys are definitely improving. We sampled a flight of beers, including a few that we've had in the past. The consensus was that the Full Nelson (5.9%) was a better beer than we initially rated it, and their winter seasonal, Lights Out (7.0%) was very nice, both rating a really good, but the others, Blue Mountain Lager (5.3%), Kolsch 151(5.0%), Evil 8 (7.7%) and the Rockfish Wheat (5.4%) were no better than good at best. But the real reason we stopped here was for the Dark Hollow (10%), and it didn't disappoint. This barrel aged imperial porter was available on Nitro in the pub, and in bottles as well. While we generally have not jumped on the nitro train, we found that this beer on tap was better than the bottle version, and a gnat's ass away from being an RFG. Four hours of driving later, we were sufficiently inebriated enough to head into West Virginia and beyond. Now before any of you jackwads start giving me grief, I am joking... don't go all "Mr. Turner" on my ass.
After an uneventful ride through West Virginia, we rolled into Athens, checked into the hotel, and headed straight to Jackie O's. The pub was featuring almost 40 of their special beers on tap ( Cherry Wood Ya Honey, Bourbon Berry Grove, Chunga's Oud Bruin, Dark Apparition (nitro), Funky South Paw, Brown Recluse, Bolero Brown, Double Dry Hopped Matriarch, Dark Apparition (Kopi Lowak), Oil of Aphrodite (Kopi Lowak), Oil of Aphrodite (Cherry Chocolate), 1/2 Shark-Alligator - 1/2 Man, Matriarch, Mystic Mama, Raccoon Dubbel, Hocking Triple, Captain Barley Heart, Berliner Weisse, Great Googly Moogly (Nitro), Cab Cherry Man, Dark Apparition (Nuts), Cellar Cuvee #1, Cellar Cuvee #2, Cellar Cuvee #3, Cellar Cuvee #4, Cellar Cuvee #5, Cellar Cuvee #6, Dark Apparition (Rum Barrel), Slim Pickins, Firefly Amber Ale, Great Googly Moogly, Wood Ya Honey, Bourbon Barrel Middle of Nowhere, Matriarch (Nitro), Hop Ryot, Baklava Braggot, Scottish, 6th Anniversary Sour Blend, a few IPA's and pale ales among the group, but the lot was made up of mostly barrel aged beers. Almost every one of these beers was a winner, so see the Beer Bible for ratings. We've been to a few bottle releases, but this one was unique. Beginning at around midnight, a line began to form outside and at 2am the bar closed, further filling the line in front of the pub. Then, one by one we were given pages from a desk calender which designated our order for beer distribution in the morning. Off to bed at 3:43 am, only to return the next morning where we tasted a few more beers and waited for our number to be called. Knowing we had a 9 hr drive back, we worked our way to the front of the line, pleaded our case to Brad, collected our beers and began the long ride home, another uneventful trip through West Virginia. All in all, it was a great trip, but one we probably won't repeat for a while. Lets hope there's some RFG's in the group.

Postscript:  No road trip through rural Appalachia would be complete without a Ned Beaty clip, but after viewing it, I found myself in the corner, curled in the fetal position, sobbing like an infant. This movie, made in 1972, is still a sphincter tightening nightmare. Watch it if you want, but you've been warned! Best enjoyed with a Founders Backwoods Bastard!